i drifted to sleep trying.

stupid temptations

i held up the phone
and put it down again.
held up and put down.
then after that
i ignored my senses and dialed the numbers.
a familiar voice speaking in a very unfamiliar way.
then hang up on me.





i looked at it.
flickered away immediately knowing that it's wrong.

the temptations of knowing wat's going on.
so i opened it.
i know it's wrong.
i know it's really wrong.
VERY WRONG.




i kept telling myself.
keep urself away
have a safe distance.
the monster inside me disapproving
my hold backs.



it was too strong.
it was just there..
right there.
if i do it
then i'll know exactly what's happening~!






i was fighting with myself in my mind.
weird. but trying to be thoughtful and stuff.




so i took it up once again. knowing that it will be really wrong.
and i got it.
and i'm very guilty now..
Very guilty.
It's a sin.
I cant leave things half dangling in the air.








it was stupid. i'm sure it was.















STUPID ME.













i couldn't resist it anymore. So i took it up.
and started...

results of excessive lies.

Lies are necessary to cover something that u dun wan ppl to know
or something that u wan to protect.


if it is necessary. we can avoid that can we? =]


now. we should onli use it when it's time. when it's necessary. when it does no harm.


but...


u use a lie to cover another lie and another lie to cover another..... and so on.






the results of excessive lie. overlapping each other. it will be hard to link it all up.
becos they are all LIES.


now..


truth happens so it's fresh in ur mind. Lies said and made. is a lie to u but it's the truth for the others listening to it.



so when it's enough. the line is there. dun cross it.
i'm sure u dun wanna give urself away

suckers

umm todays post for all the girls in the world. to warn. i've been through a couple of blogs then i found out a thing that another girl had problem with..


i experienced it myself. i was cheated broken hearted 5 times in a year. he was 'out-going' of cos.




if a guy is hitting on u. and you like how it feels. of cos u do it's perfectly normal. if he's in a relationship. but u're not. he tells u that he love u. he tells her he love her too.

let's quit wit the nonsense of. he dun mean it when he tell her. the one he truly love is me.
put that aside =]



so if he was in a relationship, he got u, having 2 girls at once. it would be fun. childish. very childish. these ppl dun deserve to be loved.


seriously. if he can do it to his gf. one day he broke off wit her come to u. how sure can u be that he wouldn't be having another girl on the other hand. mayb conversely u say that i'm diff than her. i'm more special than her. so he wouldnt do that to me. cos he know i'm the one for him.




OH REALLLYY???


if he knows who IS the ONE for him. He should go straight for it. and not linger around wit other girls. then oh i found u! and get together wit u and dump her. wat if u're now wit him. he found his ONE again. he dumps u and goes for her.






now..



HOW FUN IS THAT.


hmmm? it's no treason if u love him. just do the right thing.
think thoroughly before u act.




acting recklessly.
will have consequences that u might have missed.






i've experienced it. i've been digging the truth. i was crazy in love with him.
i would count it as a one sided then.


too much of trust and me that i've given.

so it double up the impact of it. hitting me.

COOL!

i've just found someone really easy to talk to >.<
and honestly.
it's really interesting cos he's been really honest.
i think.
he's been very nice.



no doubt he is attractive to me
the way he speaks.
as if there were no barriers.





chatting wit him made me lost all the worries
or the bad experience that i had



i t was real comforting...
thanks a lot again..
hehehehe...




=] sorri to have held u back for so long! i should've known that u're having training
SORRI!!~ u should've told me >.<
just wanna let u know that
it's really nice to talk to u...
although it's like in the midnight.





thanks for sharing ur time and thoughts wit me.
i appreciate it and glad that we spoke. kekeke..



nitez then. sweet dreams.

a cutie gave me this.

i'm all alive again becos i've found you.

today.. didnt have anything to write about sorri. no tme to do homework.


i woke up this morning
prepare to cook lunch then after that
make some tong sui for my family


so when i was cooking
my sister in law came
then she curi makan
then she ran away.












i said it's okay.
then suddenly she came back
she ask
wat u wan for ur birthday





then i say
i wan edward cullen.


















HAHAHAHAHAAHHA
lame.


















then
today
i got my birthday present
one from my bro
and one from my je je sally. in law.




































There it is....